I’m sure you know yourself. Yes you. I thought about you today; actually I’m still thinking about you as I type these words. I’m thinking about your love-life. Why? I dunno. Maybe it’s because I feel drawn to help you in whatever way that I can; to help you succeed and make the very best use of this season in your life. Maybe it’s because I’ve heard too many older folks share painful regrets on stuff they did or failed to do. Maybe their pain drives me to you. Maybe it’s the memories of heartbreaks witnessed and the shock on the faces of those who thought it’d never happen to them. Just maybe.
I’m not just thinking about you though. I’m thinking of your husband or wife (you know which suits you). That fresh dude with all (well, almost all) the qualities you’d always wanted in a man- your man. That incredibly gorgeous diva that makes the other chics fade away- that special one you want to make the one. I’m thinking about when he or she enters your world, invades your space and sweeps you off your feet- while doing things to your heart that’d make heart surgeons doubt their skills. I’m thinking of the joy you’d feel the day they choose to start a new journey with you. I’m thinking about you.
And I’m hoping you’re preparing for that phase. I’m hoping you’re discovering the timeless secrets behind deeply fulfilling relationships. And that led me to start thinking about the last time you called their name- on your knees. In prayer. To God.
It’s a tiny secret I’ve found. A simple, yet incredibly powerful practice that’ll sure bless your (romantic) relationship in a very special way. It’s the practice of regularly praying for your (prospective) partner. You know it’s interesting how we keep getting advice to pray hard when it comes to ‘m’ thingy. But how about we back up the process and start earlier- the days long before we set sights on the altar?
This is for everyone- whether you’re already married, counting days to your wedding, still getting to know each other or you’re not involved with anyone at the moment.
The practice of regularly calling out that person’s name in prayer works wonders- on you especially. It keeps your heart in the right place about that person and helps you maintain balance in your assessment and expectations of him or her. I’ve discovered that when I really pray about a person (not just a casual mention, but truly speak from my heart), my view of the individual is adjusted and aligns more closely to how God really sees that person. Praying for (not against) a person fills your heart with God’s kind of love for that person.
It purifies your motives and checks those ‘funny’ thoughts we’re all too aware of as young people. It’s hard to pray about him/her and still be lusting. It’s really hard.
As you call their name often in prayer, you will know stuff about them they never told you- things that will affect your relationship and determine if you should go on or back out will start popping up in your spirit. Someone said “love is blind but marriage will open your eyes”. I say scratch out ‘marriage’ from that and in its place, fix in ‘prayer before marriage’. However, understand when stuff is revealed, you must still make the decision how to handle it.
Here’s how it works. First, be specific. If you’re already married or in a defined relationship, you already know whose name you’ll be mentioning. Now go ahead and do it. That’s right- say their full names to God in prayer (Picture this: “Dear Lord, I present [their name] and our relationship to you today…). If you’re not involved with anyone, pray about that person that God will eventually send your way.
Also, pray about specifics. ‘Bless and protect him/her’ doesn’t really cut it. C’mon, is that all you can say about someone you’ve let into your heart? Go on and say those things that are really on your heart. That’s what makes prayer meaningful and powerful- when we speak with total sincerity. Dare to be intimate with God about that person.
It’s simple, I know. But it works.
Are you married? In a committed relationship? Or presently unattached? This simple daily practice will work wonders in your heart and in your love-life.
Let me know how it goes when you’ve tried it. Keep loving- God’s way.
P.S: Kindly share this with everyone you love, and help someone else keep loving- God’s way.
Live by Design.
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